Hendrix, Clapton, Van Halen.......ESTEBAN????

Who the hell is this Esteban dude? For those that are going "who the hell is Esteban?" my answer is... .EXACTLY. This guy has a late night infomercial for his guitar package. This guy Esteban has a "live studio audience event" where he and some broad are yapping about how great he is.

Coincedentally this broad is always holding a guitar but looks like she has NO clue how to play it, she might as well be holding a weed wacker. Hey bitch why don't you try using your own product. Estebans video showed this 92 year old lady with cerebal palsy who, after 5 short 1 hour videos, was riffing like Dimebag Darrel I shit you not.

Well they go on and on and on about what a guitar virtuoso Esteban is. Meanwhile the whole time this guy is sitting around there dressed like Zorro. No kidding, put a cape on this guy and he's Zorro. He looks like that Ward Churchill wacko from Colorado dressed as Zorro.

Well they sit there and talk about how anyone can play guitar by buying his American legacy guitar package. You can play rock and roll, country, jazz, latin, all different kinds of music with the package.

The whole thing is just utterly ridiculous, I am not sure what made me laugh harder. Esteban dressed as Zorro playing his guitar "rock style" and looking like he was really into it, or the retards in the audience clapping for this "live event" like they were watching the ghosts of Stevie Ray Vaughn and Hendrix jam on stage.

The guys playing was neither spectacular nor did it make me think he was a guitar virtuoso. I would put Esteban on the level of rhythm guitar player for the Saturday night band at Jimmy Buffets Margaritaville Restaurant.

I wonder if they throw in the Zorro outfit if you call in the next 20 minutes??? If that was the case I would totally buy it and go as Esteban this year for Halloween. Look there are tons of things better you can do with your $149.95 than buy this piece of crap. Here's 10 things you can do with it that would make you look less stupid and be more socially redeeming than buying Estebans American Guitar Legacy Package.

1. Buy a huge lawn ornament of two dogs fucking, laugh at your neighbor as he yells about his property value getting hurt.

2. Give it to a crack whore but tell her she has to run up to your boss and ask him when its "feeding time" again as she looks at his crotch

3. Go buy an X Box, take it out of its box, crush it beyond repair then put it back in the box and give it to some poor kid. Laugh as he crys like a little bitch.

4. Hire Gary Coleman for some midget tossing at your bachelor party

5. Buy Ward Churchill a bus ticket to Canda so he can get the fuck out the good ol U, S of A that he hates so much.

6. Buy the entire Hulk Hogan movie collection, including the hard to find 3 Ninjas: High Noon at Mega Mountain

7. Buy a bunch of veal and have a cookout at a PETA rally

8. Two words: STRIP CLUB

9. Hire Ogre from Revenge Of The Nerds to show up at the National Spelling Bee Championships that ESPN 34 televises and have him yell "nerds! nerrrrrrrrrrds!"

10. Buy $150 worth of Ashlee Simpson CDs and give them to a bunch of recently blinded people. Laugh as their heightened sense of hearing makes them scream in agony at her singing.